you do have to wash the dishes sometime

"Dishes can wait. That baby will grow up before you know it."

I cannot count how many well-intentioned people have uttered this phrase to me since Big Sister P was born nearly three years ago, and even before that. It is so true. It seems like just yesterday I was up at 3:00 am nursing her on the couch and watching old sitcom reruns because those and infomercials are the only things on TV at that time and I needed something to keep me awake. Now she is running, climbing, having conversations, and turning into an actual little kid. She skipped the toddler phase. And then there's Baby M, who is growing at an alarming rate

And yet...

Dishes do not wash themselves. (Unless you have a dishwasher, which I don't. And even then, only some dishes can go in there and they still need to be loaded up and put away. The dishwasher only does so much.) You can only walk across an unswept floor so many times before the crumbs sticking to your feet drive you crazy. And if you ever want to wear unwrinkled clothes again, you are going to have to fold some laundry.

I would love to be able to tell you, new parents, when exactly is the best time to get these chores done. Sadly, I cannot, because I just don't know.

They aren't always fun, and they will either take away from your quality snuggle time or your sleep time, both of which are crucial.

So the next time you're talking to the overwhelmed parent of little ones and you're tempted to quip this cliche, please stop. They are well aware that their child seems to grow at least an inch every night while they sleep (however sporadically). Maybe stick with a "Hang in there - it gets easier" or "You're doing a great job. This is a lucky baby." It will be appreciated.

Now, if you can get them to help you, that may solve both problems.

Otherwise, just snuggle!

thoughts on judgement

Today's blessing:
Not being the one to judge humanity at the end of time

That's a big job, and I wouldn't want it!

But not just at the end of time - I don't want to be the judge ever. There's too much pressure.

My Jesus said "love your neighbor" not "look with scorn upon those you think are wrong."
He said "let he who is without sin cast the first stone" not "throw rocks at people with whom you disagree."

We all live in sin. We try our best, but we still lie or cheat or covet or gossip or think bad thoughts. Every one of us. You are not an exception, and neither am I.

So how about this: I won't judge you for your sins and you don't judge me for mine. And while we're at it, let's not judge that homeless guy on the corner or the woman paying for her groceries with an EBT card or that pregnant woman who doesn't look like she could be more than 17 years old or even (dare I say it?) those two men who are holding hands. If we all did a little less judging and a little more helping, what would this world look like?

Why don't we try it and see?

I hope my kids are raising a mommy who teaches not just tolerance or acceptance, but love.

an update on the kiddos

Baby M hit the four month mark a earlier this month, so I guess it's time for an update!

Mastered Skills (most babies can do)
Holds head up steadily: Like a champ. Based on his size and head strength, people usually guess his age to be 6-7 months.
Can bear weight on legs: He certainly can! This is one strong kid.
Coos when you talk to him: More like yells. We could be in for a fun toddler-hood.
Does mini push-ups: He does. I know it'll be no time at all before he starts crawling. Yikes.

Emerging Skills (half of babies can do)
Can grasp a toy: He can. He has a bouncy chair thing that we put him in sometimes, and it has a bar that goes over him with a couple little dangling toys. He likes to grab onto the zebraffe (shape of a giraffe, stripes like a zebra) and just yell at the poor thing. I don't know what it did to make him mad.
Reaches out for objects: Like the zebraffe? And a few other toys.
Can roll over: Both ways! Watch out, world!

Advanced Skills (a few babies can do)
Imitates speech sounds (baba, dada): He doesn't quite have the consonants down, but he sure loves to make noise at you!
May cut first tooth: Not yet, thank goodness. He drools like crazy, though, so I kind of wonder if it's coming.

Our little chunker is now in nine month clothing, and the 12 month stuff that we have is not comically large on him. Mommy's not okay with this. I guess it makes sense, though, since he eats all the time!

The kids were so fortunate to get to celebrate two Christmases this year. We celebrated with Daddy's family the weekend before Christmas, and then we road tripped to see mine for Christmas Eve and Christmas day. Daddy had to go back home the day after Christmas, but I stayed with the kids for another week. All three of my brothers made it home, too, so it was nice to have the whole family together for the first time since I don't even remember when! I think Grandpa and Grandma enjoyed the extra time, too.

Big Sister P has officially hit the terrible twos, which I hear actually get worse at age three. (Which is next month. Yikes.) There's something to look forward to. I think one of her biggest issues is that she misses our big house on the prairie. We have become hesitant to go anywhere now because we don't want to deal with the inevitable freak out when we tell her that we have to go home. She asks about our old house and when we get to go to the old house and why our friend C is now living in our old house. Trust me, kid, there's a lot that I miss about it, too! I feel bad for our neighbors, though. That girl has lungs!

The tantrums, however, probably seem way more frequent than they actually are. Most of the time, she's a polite, intelligent, and caring kid. When Grammy explained what she was doing when she was shopping for her work's Adopt a Family, P got very concerned and asked if she could buy a toy for the kids who weren't getting any presents. How's that for heart-warming?

She's learned several new words recently, including consequences and generosity. "If I listen to mommy and daddy, there are no consequences!" She's not a fan of the time out.

When counting, she still usually skips over 14 and 15, but other than that, she can count to 20. Every now and then, she even gets those two numbers in there.

P's new favorite activity is washing dishes. I hope she continues to enjoy this, because I will pay her good money when she's old enough to actually get them clean. Dishes are, by far, my least favorite household chore.

Uncle A got her the movie "Frozen" for Christmas, so I am now experiencing what most parents went through exactly one year ago. I really don't mind it, though. It's a cute movie, and it's nice to rotate it with Tangled. Every single one of the songs gets stuck in your head, though. I think the phrase Husband used yesterday was "audio crack." That sounds about right. She loves wearing her hair in braids like Anna, and she switches back and forth between which sister she is, so I don't have to be Elsa every time.

Anna hair!

We went to a friend's house for dinner last month, and P helped make dessert!

Strong boy with a nice drool train...

P helped Grandpa with his crossword puzzle; what a girl!

Rocking the sweater vest like a...social studies teacher?

Sibling love! Most of the time...

one word 2015

Today's blessing:
Grace

Friends, I'm going to try something this year. #oneword365 has been on my heart since I first heard about it two years ago, and I think this is the year. Anna at girl with blog summed it up in her 2014 oneword post by saying "...instead of guilt over goals un-fulfilled, there was drive to grow in a specific area that actually permeated many."

Consistent

This is my word. Throughout 2015, I will work on being more consistent in all areas of my life, including this blog.

Consistent means one or two posts a month. Maybe more, but no fewer.

Consistent means putting away five things that aren't where they belong before I go to bed. At least most nights.

Consistent means averaging 10,000 steps per day.

Consistent does not mean perfect. Something done imperfectly is better than nothing getting done at all. A blog post without edited pictures and fancy links is better than no blog post.

Returning two items to their home or two pieces of junk mail to the recycling, while not as good as five, is better than none.

Running two miles, while not always as good as running five, is better than not running at all.

In the spirit of embracing my imperfection, I spent a bunch of time yesterday working on a graphic. I wanted something fun and bright and impressive. It has become clear to me that I have a lot to learn about picmonkey, so this is what you get for now!

Did you choose a word or make a resolution? Tell me about it so we can encourage each other!

small changes

Today's blessing:
Wool socks. Because, as my husband says, I have dead people feet.

You may notice some small changes taking place around here. Husband pointed out that I share a lot of personal information. I mean, a lot. Anyone reading this blog wouldn't have to dig too far to learn the full names of our children, what they like and dislike, and generally where we live. Also, there are tons of pictures. I realize that nearly everyone who reads this probably already has all of that information anyways, but it only takes one crazy person to stumble upon my little family and do bad things. That said, I'll be spending the next few days taking down many of the bigger identifiers, meaning names and specific locations. Pictures will remain.

Big sister P and Baby M are trying to raise a mommy who is not paranoid, just careful!

an update on our family of four

It's been quiet around here as we get used to being a family of four. The Baby is now six weeks old, so I thought it was time for an update!

P still loves being a big sister, which is such a relief. The novelty of having a little one around hasn't worn off yet, and she's still eager to help whenever she can.

I recently decided, out of respect for the teenager that she will be someday, not to share about bathroom habits online.

Some of P's favorite things to do recently include playing with the neighbor girls and going to the park. If we can get both at the same time, even better! She's a bit timid at the park - she likes the little kid swing where she sits inside it and can't fall out, but she doesn't like to swing too high. She also doesn't usually like to go down the slide. Every now and then she'll hold our hands and slide down. Baby steps!

Until now, P has been a self-inflicted vegetarian. She wants nothing to do with anything meat related. Then today, we were playing with the neighbor girls, when I told her it was time for lunch. She didn't want to leave, so I said that she could stay and eat chicken or go home and eat noodles. So we stayed and ate chicken. Peer pressure and the desire to continue playing with someone else's toys are very strong motivators!

As for Bsby M, here's how he's doing so far at six weeks:
Mastered Skills (most babies can do)
Lifts head: Yes indeed. We haven't been great about getting him tummy time, but he's still getting strong. When we hold him up on our shoulders he can hold his head up for a good 30 seconds before he needs a little break.

Responds to sound: If being soothed whenever he hears "Your Song" by Elton John counts as responding to sound, then yes. And he sometimes seems to react to our voices a little bit, too.

Stares at faces: Yes he does, and who could resist staring back into those beautiful steel blue eyes? He's a charmer already!

Can see black and white patterns: Um...probably, but how can you tell?

Emerging Skills (half of babies can do)
Follows objects: Maybe a little bit. He would rather stare and Mommy or Daddy.

Oohs and ahs: Not yet, but he sure is working on using his voice!

Advanced Skills (a few babies can do)
Smiles: Only when he's gassy, though I swear she smiled at P the other day for real. Big sister can have the first smile - I'm okay with that!

Laughs: Not yet, but with as dorky as his father is, it's only a matter of time.

Holds head at 45-degree angle: Not yet, but again, he needs more tummy time!

This boy is a chunker! He is currently wearing a 6 month sleeper (he's only 6 weeks!) and it's big, but not comically large! I guess the fact that he nurses almost constantly is paying off!

M likes to take baths. And by likes, I mean he may be crying and fussy, and when I get him in the tub, he stops crying. He just kind of looks around and kicks his feet and resists my attempts to clean his chins. (There are at least two of them. He's working on a third.) He doesn't even mind getting water dumped over his head. It's pretty remarkable to me.

I think we're past the stage where M wakes up every hour or two to eat, so that's helpful! The other night, I think he even let me sleep for a little over four hours! Amazing!

Other than constant tiredness, Husband and I are doing well. He's back at school and giving tours for the admissions office while eagerly awaiting the start of basketball season, while I'm at home playing with babies and trying to crochet every now and then. I started running about a week and a half ago, which has dramatically improved my mood!

P discovered a love of black olives. That's mommy's girl!

So little! This was M on his due date. We are so grateful for an "extra week!"

Snuggling with Daddy!

Three generations

My aunt included these as a gift for P when they sent a baby gift for M. She absolutely loves building with her Legos, and she gets so creative!

Shortly after this, we stopped swaddling him.

So here's a great story for you. We took a walk one day up to Daddy's school. We were walking around one of the main buildings, when P heard music - a brass ensemble practicing for chapel that day. She asked if we could go in the church and see the instruments, so we did. Then she didn't want to leave. So we stayed for chapel. She found this teddy bear in one of the "quiet" bags at the back of church, and spent the second half of the service baptizing it. She would stick her hand in the font, make a cross on its forehead, and say "Jesus loves you very much." I am not making any of this up.

Matching diapers! Excuse the blurriness - it's hard enough to get a decent picture of one moving target, much less two!

How sweet is this? P loves little brother. We think she'll grow on him as soon as he's old enough to defend himself from her well-intentioned attacks.

Nothing like a little snuggle time in the morning!

Click here, scroll down to the last picture, and read the caption. I'll wait.
Did I call this, or what? I'm not even kidding.

our little girl: 31 months

As of last month, my baby girl is officially two and a half! In my defense, I did have this post started well before August 9th. Then life happened and we realized that the move we had known about for over a year was actually happening in a few weeks, so we had to pack. It's funny how things can still sneak up on you when you've been planning them for so long...

Anyhow - two months in one update! Here we go!

P has learned her last name! We talked about it a little bit one night while we were reading to her (one of those awesome personalized books where the animals spell out the kid's name), but she was pretty adamant that her name was "P" and nothing else. Then, all of a sudden, a few nights later, she was dancing around at church during VBS telling us her first and last name. We didn't think it stuck, but I guess, once again, we underestimated her! before long she also learned that Mommy and Daddy have the same last name, and Nugget will too.

P is starting to grasp the very beginnings of the concept of spelling. She knows what letters certain words start with, and if we ask her about other words that start with the same sound, she can usually get them. (For example, she knows the "baby" starts with "b." If we ask her what "ball" or "bubble" start with, she can sometimes get it right - with a little prompting!)

P has felt her little brother move before, but she never really acknowledged that it was him. In the last two months, however, if finally clicked. Towards the end, whenever we would be snuggling and she'd feel him, she'd sit up and get this little smirk on her face.

One of the greatest quotes she learned this month: "Stinky ear cheese is no good!" (We may have let her go a bit too long without a bath. She didn't actually have any ear cheese, but her feet were getting awfully ripe!)

We enjoyed a week long visit to my parent's home in July, and I think P had a pretty good time. I know my family had a good time with her! Grandpa loves to golf, so now when she goes to visit them, she has her own set of golf clubs. Within ten minutes, Uncle A had taught her to correctly identify each of her three clubs. That's right, my two and a half year old knows what a driver, iron, and putter are. I'm not sure I knew that before this lesson.

She was a real trooper all throughout the move - she got a little unnerved towards the end when everything was boxed up, but all she did was cry a few times and be extra snuggly. She actually seemed to grasp the concept of "We have to put all of our things in boxes so we can take them to the new apartment. Then we'll get them out again." So that helped. It's so nice to be able to explain things to her and be rational. I know we're pretty lucky to be able to do that with a two and a half year old. I've had more trouble reasoning with some adults than I do with her!

She got settled into our new place very well, and even enjoys having some neighbor girls to play with. I definitely think the socialization will be very good for her!

On September 4th, P became a big sister! She still likes her little brother, almost a whole week later, so we're pretty thrilled about that. It's definitely been an adjustment for everyone, but she is taking it remarkably well. She'll act up a little bit from time to time, but as long as we're intentional about spending time alone with her and talking to her calmly, she's pretty good. It's hard to stay patient when you're dealing with newborn sleep deprivation, but it's ten times harder to yell at your oldest (because we have an oldest and a youngest, now) and make her want to listen to you even less!

Here are a couple picture highlights from the last two months. Okay, a bunch of picture highlights. I just couldn't choose, and pictures upload way faster in the cities than they did at our old house!

Playing with friend S at church.

P saw Grandma using a hair dryer. Pretty creative!

Playing with friend E!

P loves to help me crochet. I will gladly sacrifice a hat to let her practice!

One last picture in front of our "old house."

P got Auntie J a baby for her birthday. She even offered to baby-sit. What a sweetie.

Thanks to my wonderful friend, Rebecca, for the next few photos. Find out more about her and book your own photo shoot by checking out her website here!

P loves having a park less than a block from our new apartment! We haven't been taking full advantage of it, but now that Nugget's out and I'm a little more mobile, I think we'll definitely have to utilize it more during the last few weeks of decent weather!

My dress from when I was a kid. Hello, late 1980s!

When I told P we had to walk up to Daddy's school, she insisted on wearing her backpack, in which she packed a teddy bear and a bottle. Just in case of an emergency.

Showing off her new shirt at the hospital!

Watching over baby brother.

She still likes him...

And LOVES to play on the floor with him. I have a feeling that if I left them alone together for more than a minute, I would come back to find Mark buried under a pile of toys that she wanted to share.